Telling the Truth to Yourself

Sometimes we get caught up in worring about, "What is the truth?"...Did O. J. do it, was the advertising honest, do politicians ever tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, did our kids really just 'go to the mall', can I trust a salesman...etc?...I ascribe to a different truth, "You can't cheat an honest (wo)man." W.C. Fields

Worrying about the truth of others is missing the point...What is true for you? In your most honest moments, you know that YOU could be more honest (if not, you haven't looked hard enough)...Being present to reality, letting go of expectations, releasing from the stories we tell about our lives and letting go of our insecurities (about ourselves and our okayness), will bring us closer to the truth....

The truth we seek is in ourselves...not outside...when someone lies to us, personal or otherwise, they depend on our dishonesty...if we look to ourselves, the lies will have no power and our lives will be little affected...Lies have their own stink, and when you're centered you'll smell it...the truth will be clear...even if it is simply, "I don't know what the truth is right now." Telling someone that, from a truthful place, will disarm them...You will see how hard they may try, "...to get you to believe them"...But if you remain centered in your own truth you will find that the answers will be clearer than ever before....

The person you most NEED to tell you the truth...IS YOU..."It seems true" is fine, or, "I'm uncomfortable with what you're saying." or, "That doesn't seem to be true for me." can all be true for us...But we don't say these things because we don't want to offend...we want to believe people and we want them to take care of us...but first we must take care of ourselves and in the process we take care of them...If I lie to you and you accept it, I lose respect for you...If I lie to you and you refuse to be taken in...I'm mad, frantic, determined to convince...AND...in the end relieved, that you didn't buy into it...It is a great act of kindness to be true to yourself, because in the end it supports others to find their path....

It is not an easy journey...this telling yourself the truth...but it is worth the trials...you will benefit, others will benefit, life will seem more vital and you will feel more alive...tell the truth and in time it will vanquish anxiety, depression, distress and frustration...the truth (if it is yours) will set you free...It is not an argument, and you needn't argue, it is simply the truth...remember this New Years to move forward in your journey to tell yourself the truth; and in between...love the one's you're with...until next time...I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry






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...and to you, Peace, Harmony and Love

...Extra Terrestrials have been sighted less than one light year from earth...they seem to be coming in an armada or flotilla of ships...headed, apparently, directly for earth....

We are one people...earthlings...bracing for what is to come, needing to depend upon each other...now, it is time to set aside our differences, focus on what makes us one people...come together and welcome the strangers...let them know that they can not divide us...we are strong because we are one....

One day perhaps we will include them, but for now it is important to know and trust our neighbors...we have learned that the only weapon the others have brought with them is the power to play one against the other...we must be vigilant and remain resolute...we are one...one people, no matter where we are found on this planet...we will not be divided...for it is only in division that we are weak and that we will fall...If we remain true to our people, peace will ensue, security will be complete, and love between us all, will conquer...they have as much told us so...in their arrogance they said, "You, people of earth, will not stand for long before our weapons of disharmony and divisiveness...you will fall into meaningless squabbles and look to us as saviors...we will own you and your planet within the year...you are helpless before our manipulations of making you play favorites against each other...You are enslaved now in your petty fights and forever more you will be enslaved to your own weaknesses...the Algorithms"....

We have a little time, now, reach out to whomever you have a dispute, release and resolve, make peace and let it grow until nations do the same...love the ones you're with...love yourself...be well...have the happiest of holidays, however, you chose to celebrate....until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry





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The Day after Tomorrow...

On that day things will be better...today is full of living, feelings, frustrations, things undone and yet to do and won't get done...but the day after tomorrow will be different...I hope...the day before yesterday was a good day and even if there were some problems it wasn't so bad...today is not the same at all...things are crazy, issues are real, stuff neeeeeds to be done, today....

Today, of course, is the day after tomorrow and will be the day before yesterday...It is what we have, and it is the best of all possible worlds...it is also the worst of all possible worlds and the least important of all that we want...in short, it is everything under the sun...today is what we have, precious, and practical, frustrating and wondrous...today is the moment where all your dreams will be fulfilled...not tomorrow, and not last night...today...if life has you down, or frustration is building...stop, breathe, let yourself experience your feelings...and then let go...breathe, again...and remember, today is the best time in the world, and you are everything you need to be...it has always been so and it will always be so...today is where we live and you can have peace of mind, today...if you choose...declare it to be, feel what you need to feel and move on...not sometime tomorrow, but right now, today....

I hope this will be the best holiday for each of you...and that you will feel the love, good will and joy that the winter solstice can bring as we end the seasons of planting and gathering and join hands to share the quiet of long winter nights...be well, love the ones you're with...I remain, Respectfully Yours, Larry






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Disembarking from the River of Circumstance

Today the Core Paradigm took a giant leap...If you haven't been following along, the Core Paradigm is what I call the discovery I and my friends made nineteen years ago about the nature of our unique human consciousness and motivation...It helps me and thousands of others to understand and simplify the complexity of our behaviors and provides a structure for people, mentally and emotionally, to exit their self imposed destructive circumstances and emotional boxes...It is a new way of seeing human behavior and motivation (as opposed to Mental Health)...if you are stuck in negative life patterns, even occasionally, or feeling negative emotions, too often, understanding the Core Paradigm can allow "YOU" the big YOU to re-emerge in situations and circumstances that previously only the reactive 'you' (called, the Auto/Protector self) operated...the result is a more balanced and productive life....

A quick review...The Core Paradigm is deceptively simple: Two selves...one Authentic, creative, imaginative, self expressive...motivated by curiosity, productivity, service; and experiencing love, goodwill, integrity, high self esteem and feelings of peace, tranquillity, serenity and well being:

The other self...the auto/protector self...driven by fear, pain and loss, using cunning, manipulation, and the human version of fight/flight/freeze...when we are triggered into this state of consciousness we feel fear, shame, terror, anger, frustration and distress; we experience 'either/or' thinking, anxiety, envy, jealousy, stubbornness, resentfulness and depression...I would coach people that, "We get triggered and then we cope...and exiting that state will lead to a more authentic life experience"...but....

Today a new wrinkle...every so often a client would ask, "Triggered positively or negatively?" And I would slough it off with, "No, triggers are negatively experienced circumstances or situations." They would get it, and all was good...except, there ARE "positive" triggers...there is a whole other state that has troubled me for nineteen years...I use to say that there were two kinds of people, those who were so tired of their coping behavior and its consequences that they were ready to do anything to let it go...easy to work with clients, who got a lot out of the work...and then there were the other people, who coped and their coping seemed to be successful (makes money, etc. but...)...they would come to me for coaching when circumstances seemed to be against them, but they just couldn't let go of the coping that...made them make money, or got them favors, or gave them the trappings of success...When coping seemed "to work" they were unwilling to let it go (and why should they, even if it did have a little downside or two?)...It sorta worked...but not really...what was wrong? I didn't know...then today it finally made sense....

You get "triggered" by circumstances, situations and conditions...we all do and sometime those trigger us into fight/fight/freeze ...and sometimes they trigger us into affinity/attachment/acquiring behaviors...we're happy, (like Tiger), we're getting what we want, we're succeeding...What could be better? If you're experiencing that you probably wouldn't want to stop, either...but for some of us, we do...and for many more they'd be better for it (I could never say that with certainty until today)....

What is better than getting what you want, or being attached to the things you have, or feeling life is good "because"...or having life give you a lift, or tell you how powerful you are...or give you all the trappings of success?...what indeed could be better?...if your answer is 'nothing', then thanks for reading this far, but you'd best move on now....

What is better, by far, is to get off the roller coaster of the river of circumstance...being triggered, positively or negatively, can be very problematic in today's world...if you value the sense of your own self empowerment, your own integrity, and your genuine well being...if you want to know real happiness, and experience true caring for yourself and others...you'll begin to distinguish between being a satisfied "being"...and "Happy because...." Triggered humans are "human doings", not 'human beings'....

There is a place where real happiness and well being resides...it is past the things of life, and past the momentary circumstances...it is a place that babies, who have had their NEEDS well met, reside...angelic, and serene...not needing anything and trusting that the emergence of wants will not be the death of their serenity...it is the place where many guru's strive to replicate, but it doesn't have to be only on an isolated mountain top (or in a baby's crib), and we don't have to reject wanting or having...learning how to want without it triggering us and learning to achieve without being attached to it, will be quite a trick....

My distress in life is certainly a product of forgetting that my needs are already met and moaning about the wants I have or don't have and failures to get 'whatever'...Too often, I expect, I am deriving my happiness out of winning, or getting (not needs met, but wants)...My needs are met (as all of ours are [if not we'd be dead]) I'm looking for the next stop, as I bob on the river of circumstance, and I hope you will join me, as I make a reservation to get off and get on with being...more on this later as I get a better handle on it...please feel free to chip in...it is an exciting time (or is it?)...is it circumstance, or the chance to be free...time will tell....

In the mean time, love the one's you're with, until next time...I remain, Larry










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How are you...Really?

How are you? Do you answer with a perfunctory, "fine", a more detailed, explanation, or a genuine self assessment, "Feelin' a little blue, today."...in any case, "How are YOU, really?"...what does it mean to be 'fine' or 'not fine'? Your feelings are your scorecard...how you feel about stuff, is just your emotional response to the content of your life...you are fine, even if you're dying from cancer or your best friend was in a horrible accident...you're fine...being sick, frustrated, or broke are just the stuff of life, being sad is the scorecard...it's how you know that those things are not good for you...if you had no feelings, nothing would matter, "ooh, arm cut off...great, I guess"...feelings and emotions respond or react to what we hold as valuable or important in our life...so if you're feeling sad...you're fine...and some sad things are going on in your life....

Mad, glad, sad, scared, and ashamed are easy ways to understand how you're feeling...If someone asks you how you're feeling, you might wish to review those five before answering, "I'm good" which isn't a feeling at all... or, "I feel like you shouldn't be doing that" which is a thought not a feeling...but none of that addresses how you are? If you are triggered and in your fight/flight/freeze (auto/protector) state of consciousness, then you are a victim...argue that if you must, but it will be no less true at the end of your rant...you are a victim, if you're triggered by anything in life...and we all get triggered...you are a victim...but being triggered and 'feeling' the fear, sadness or shame of victim hood isn't the end of the story...YOU the big authentic YOU is fine...your auto/protector self may see things differently, but YOU has a choice....

Who YOU are is a gift...a unique and special person who views the world from a discrete point of view...YOU are fine and perhaps you are sad, scared, angry or deeply ashamed...share that with the one's you love...not as a complaint or rant...but as the truth of your fight/flight/freeze personae, who you know is trying to survive and trying to protect you from the pain and fear of your life....

When you allow yourself to grieve, own your feelings as yours and your reaction to life's little and big distractions...YOU will return and YOU will know...without doubt or fear, that YOU and 'you' are loved...that life as a dynamic state is better for your passing and participating... YOU are fine...no matter the circumstance...be well, prosper in your feelings of love and joy, celebrate your feelings of fear, shame and sadness...and let them go in the warmth of your certainty that, "this too, shall pass"...Live well, love the ones you're with and remember to express your gratitude, admiration and satisfaction each and every day, until next time I remain...Larry




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Tiger or Tigger...What's a Tigger to Do?

I know, can't stand another moment of Tiger bashing...not the point...once again rationalization and misdirection are being used as arguments, bah humbug...Sometimes we get confused...sometimes obfuscation is the objective...When someone of celebrity is caught in an indiscretion we often hear, " ...I'm not perfect." as a seeming defense and admonishment to us to quit holding their feet to the fire...Tiger used that...Tigger never did...But where was it written that anyone was holding Tiger to the standard of perfection? Of decency yes, but not perfection...Is it a lack of perfection that he is being excoriated for; or a lack of decency? Is it imperfect to lie, cheat, and mislead your wife, and children; or is it simply indecent of you to do such things? No matter how common it is to cheat does that justify it or make it decent? Tiger has every right to philander, but the stand up guy image will suffer...when he chooses to display his loving family and his devotion while playing the cad, people will notice and be disappointed and will seek answers...it is the way we are...Our celebrities certainly hope we will leave them alone when their indiscretions are exposed...they ask us to RESPECT their privacy...and tell us it is a failure of perfection (but it isn't)...they, and we, can't have it both ways...all the trappings of celebrity or integrity...the wealth and admiration...and complete indifference to their egotistical self indulgence...The lying is by choice, the philandering is by choice...the unwillingness to live with dignity and decency to those you say you love is by choice...craven, 'want my cake and eat it too' (all puns intended) behavior will, when it comes to light, be fodder for the media and a cautionary tale for us all...If you live your life as if any detail may be made public tomorrow morning you would be better for it...you don't need to be perfect...Tigger may be...but you do owe it to yourself to strive to be decent, at least with your family and your friends...and if you're not...please...expect to be held accountable....Eldrick, shame on you...man up... Remember...love the one's you're with, tell the truth even when it might mean pain...until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry TTFN (Ta Ta for now)





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'tis the season...for each and everyone of us...

Last time we spoke of authorities and how fragmented our society has become...today we speak of the universal...goodwill, love, caring for our neighbor and the spirit of the holiday's...everyone may have their own take on just what that is to them...but the winter solstice has long been a time to reflect, a time to gather together and share the harvest that would need to last until the next spring...Joy to the world, never ending light, Peace on earth, are just a few of the universal truths we all embrace...

Winter

"For the illusion that we have not lived in Vain"

Winter begins its journey into seasons less harsh,

fading, passing from the tendrils of cobwebs

created from the long nights and freezing rain.

Ah, gone at last, we seek the renewal of spring

and cherish the buds of our own rebirth;

awakened into a world gone slightly less mad

simply because we can crawl out from under our

heavy coats, our stiff joints and sluggish thoughts.

Summer will yet bring warmth,

welcomed at first, then stifling as we labor,

like penance for the promise of payment,

in fall's gold and yellow endings.

Daze are long and lazy only for the poet;

Soon fall's abundance rests in larders

full of promise for winter

--a time to reflect and see--

has the passing, this time, made a difference?

We remain relentless, as is the folly of wars;

fought by each of us to cast out our daemons,

or by self righteous, patriotic bands of zealots

bent on saving a world whose only curse

is humanities undying need to proclaim...

"Hooray for our side."

Wars rage, men bluster, children cry,

and in the end

there is promise only in the endings

never in the fighting.

Cursed by our need for meaning,

too often, we fail to see

Winter's glory...

May you find peace and love this holiday season...

and appreciate the glory which is YOU....

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Who's in Charge Here, Anyway?

For a long time, we in America, and in the western world, lived with some universal authorities (actually, all cultures live with universal authorities...it is simply the human way)...Yes, Martin Luther decried the corruption of the Catholic (meaning universal) Church and started the Protestant movement...but that just makes the point, protesting against the universal authority...Our founding fathers (maybe a mother or two) established that we had certain inalienable authorities (rights if you must) and the march that began with the Magna Carta reached fruition in America....

In America, we believed in the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, the three branches of government and the two party system...We believed in our goodness, ultimately, and we believed we meant well for all the world...We were the good guys and our leaders were Washington, Lincoln, Teddy, Franklin, Ike and any of a number of Kennedy's...nobody, EVER, stood up in congress and called them a liar...and nobody, EVER, told their child they would need permission to listen to their President...we had authorities...Doctors, Lawyers, Statesmen and Clerics...Our scientists were pure and focused on truth...life for the rest of us had order and perhaps a chance at justice...then someone noticed that the Emperor had no clothes....

Today, the gen Xer's and Yer's have many authorities and none at all...and in the process it has affected us all...We are the most data inundated, communication available, information polluted generation ever...and there's not an authority in sight...Oh, I'm sorry...there are eight hundred, forty seven million, nine hundred and sixty three authorities in sight every eight minutes...it amounts to the same thing...we have no universal authorities...everyone believes anything and backs it up with everything or nothing...having a million authorities means having no authorities at all...and as fun as that may...there is a problem....

No matter what, in a social group of Human Beings when there is an absence of authority a vacuum is created...the universe hates a vacuum...and begins to fill it, but not always with the highest quality of 'stuff'...we as individuals, need authority in our lives...(even you two, who are certain[on good authority] that you don't need any %#$&*! authority...need authority)...When, as now, no ONE authority exists (by ONE I mean approximately one...majority one or consenses one) then twenty pop up then eighty and so on...WE CAN'T AGREE ON A THING!!! (and, of course, probably not even that)....

Is there global warming...or not...is religion helpful or hurtful...is free trade good or bad...is America on the side of right or just the "might side"...do we fight for oil or justice...is capitalism the root of all evil or the savior of mankind...Are they REALLY too big to fail or is it a scam???whatever the issue there aren't only two sides there are twenty, or twenty thousand, or twenty million, or twenty one more than people talking about it....

What do you believe? Who do you quote as authority to back that belief...How sure are you that your position is right! Just! The best! and how likely would it be to find ten more people in a room of twelve to agree with you? (I'd say that would be unlikely, but, of course, I couldn't get ten people in a room of twelve to agree with me....)

So, what...so we don't have any authorities anymore...who cares...the chaos it creates, the paralysis it empowers may be a good or bad thing depending on who you ask, or what search engine you prefer...but like it or not we need authorities and our society will flounder around until one emerges...maybe we should take notice and make sure it is the one we want...or not...who knows...how can anyone know anything anyway...do we really need to have authority in our life? Again, I'd say yes, but....

It already happened...Obama, was a nobody, someone outside of the political machine and he captured not only a nation, but the world, we are hungry for fresh authority, honest authority, just authority and it will not come from the bankrupt institutions that have failed us to date...we will need to search our souls and find our truths from within...we will need to learn how to trust, and what to trust, by learning the process of trusting...we will need to learn how to have faith in ourselves and the truth of our wisdom and the certainty of our uncertainty...we will need to compare our souls for common ground that over arches the failed authority of churches, governments, corporations and military urgency's...we will need to wake up...learn to live in the NOW of authentic self expression...find universal truths in living with respect, compassion, peace, kindness and service to our world and our neighbors...we must eschew the divisive, enjoy our individual practices and respect those of others...we must learn how to live with dignity and learn to support the dignity of others...we need to walk away from hostility and support others to walk away as well...we need to believe in the possible and strive for the impossible...we must take solace and give solace when we fail...we need to empower those of us who seek to lead with these values and once again show our respect for our leaders when our leaders have gained that right of respect through honesty and diligence...most of all, we need to find real authority in our lives...the kind that can be shared with confidence by our neighbors...a daunting task...may be a while before we achieve it...many of us will check out and just try to get by...not a bad thing, but, in time we will discover some new universal truths and in the mean time, remember...love the one's you're with, until next time, I remain, Respectfully Yours, Larry






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Skippy Takes a Break

Skippy is my alter ego...he runs my life when conditions seem to warrant his protection...situations like trying to perform a skill, or fix something mechanical...all the situations I apparently failed at as a child at the foot of a very angry father...Skippy is my friend, he sabotages my golf shots, makes me crazy when I can't put together a Christmas present and generally makes a nuisance out of himself...when I am channelling Skippy I feel depressed, anxious, sad, frustrated, stubborn, angry, and guilty...Skippy is my friend....

The good news is you have a Skippy too...an alter ego formed in early childhood to fight the bears of your world...the feelings you have which are problematic, the behaviors which are unproductive or savagely counter to your well being...a good friend who's only job is to keep you safe...

"Good friend you say, Sounds more like a Hitler creep"...Yes, that was Skippy too...Even though Skippy can produce some hideous results, the solution to success is not to hate him or denigrate him (or her) the answer is to love him/her into submission...Skippy means well, he is just trying to cope when coping is the problem...You are trying to cope when coping is the problem...learn how to recognize when Skippy is running (spelled ruining) your life and acknowledge his/her desire to protect you and ask Skippy to take a break...eventually he/she will and YOU the big YOU can get back to being in charge of your life...name your Skippy...an affectionate playful name and learn to recognize when you have slipped into that Skippy behavior...then stop, breathe and release from the fear that drives you to be a person you just as soon not be...give Skippy a break...I have been, and my golf is far more fun and I'm scoring better too! Remember, love the one's you're with...until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry




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Skippy and Me--Overcoming Limitations

Have you ever noticed that sometimes it seems that there is a glass ceiling on your life...things that just never seem to quite turn out or let you have the success (joy, peace of mind, goodwill, etc.--Pick one--) you are looking for? Boy that's been true for me. When I go out to play golf, a game I've been playing for fifty years things often get weird.

In my book "Life after Survival: Consciously Evolving our Consciousness" I talk about the Core Paradigm and how the fear/pain based consciousness can take over and direct our lives and results, without our Authentic Self having a say...The Auto/Protector is a powerful player in my life and yours and can keep us from having things we want in life...The Auto/protector is trying to act in your best interest to avoid pain or keep you safe but its methods often are at odds with the more rational part of us that would like to achieve certain things in our lives. In the Core Profile I often ask clients to name their Auto/protector self as a way of dis-identifying from its powerful effects in their lives...well, I decided to take my own advice... I took to calling my fear based reaction, Skippy, a light and fun name that both lightened and relaxed the angst I would feel on the golf course...the results were quite amazing...While I should be able to play competently on a golf course I was seldom breaking a hundred...shots would go everywhere but near the hole...and then when I started addressing Skippy and telling him it was okay to let Larry play once in a while things began to change...I began to really enjoy golf again...I started making pars and birdies...I hit the ball further and straighter and I began facing some of the daemons that have plagued me since childhood...You can too...Take a look at some of your coping behaviors...notice the feelings you have when you are upset and put a name to them all, as if, it was someone else using your body to feel these things and do these behaviors (because in very real ways, IT IS)...talk to this person...tell them you understand they are trying to protect you, but it is safe now and you'd like to play too...see if this separation helps you as you face anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, guilt and shame...learn that coping is just that...coping...not living and loving and being alive...learn to dis-identify from the unsuccessful behaviors in your life and bring more of YOU the big YOU to the party...until next time...Love the one's you're with...I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry




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When will it be alright?

Sometimes the answer is today, sometimes the day after tomorrow, and for many, deep in their souls, the answer is, "When and if I get to Heaven".... When will it be alright for you? When you know that living today, with things just the way they are, is perfect...When the conditions you face are, whatever they are, but just right for you...When you stop, breathe and release from the grind of trying to fix things, or do things, or force things and begin to live with things as they are and as you choose them to be, and with love for all things in your heart...then? Okay....

"But wait!!! Choose, abuse, injustice, squalor, poverty, anger, resentment, hate and war??? Never, never, never...I want things to change, to be different, to be better...then and only then will it be alright!!! I want things to be fair and right and good...I want it to be safe for me and everyone and everyone to have a chance...I want things to work and people to care and love to win and life to sing...I want it better than it is right now...and its not...and I'm not...I'm not...and I want to be." (It's true, isn't it? A little voice speaking to you?)

It could be...it could be better right NOW...if you would be better right now, if you would take the risk to relax, to trust, to breathe, and know deep within your heart, no matter the circumstance, everything is unfolding just as it should and it is safe for YOU to be well ("no, it's not"...says your little voice screaming in your head)...allow yourself to be happy...to be at peace and ready to express your gift and love into life...making you part of the solution instead of part of the problem....("How? Oh, god please, how?", continues your little voice).

Yes, there are many things that call for our attention...but not our fear, and dread and pain...there are things to do in this world and if we do them from a place of inspiration then inspiration is what we contribute...If we live each day committed to releasing from our fear and pain and self protective ego; and begin each morning living from our authentic self expression, then each day we will be alright and the world will be just that much better for our passing thru it...Live today, as if it is the best possible day and be excited about tomorrow, as it will be better yet...acknowledge the pain and fear, but don't let its presence direct your actions or win the day...discover the truth...you are alright...better than alright...you are a gift to the world, and if you need to seek a Life coach, do so, so that you can discover that the best way you can express your gift, is to trust yourself and to love yourself; allow others to love you; then allow yourself to breathe...remember, Love the one's you're with, until next time...I remain, Respectfully Yours, Larry






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Health Care Reform? I don't think so...

Let's see a show of hands...how many of you would like to see the fox in charge of the hen house? If you want eggs in the morning best to keep the fox out of your security plans...This silly debate about health care reform is really about who's going to PAY for health care...not anything about actually getting care or reforming the system of everybody grasping for the almighty (oops) not so almighty, dollar. Health care traditionally, from the beginning of time has always been about the health and welfare of the society...the witch doctor didn't work for an insurance company she worked for the community...do you really want someone making a decision about your health based on how many bills they have this month? Do you want the payment system set up like insurance where we tell you anything to get you to buy, then do everything not to pay off...come on folks...for profit doctors, hospitals, medication is a grand way to keep the very rich healthy, wealthy and wise...the rest of us can just eat cake, why, indeed, should healthcare be for everyone...what commie, pinko thought that up...oh, yeah, just about everyone's grandma...love the ones you're with...respectfully, Larry






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Even the hard times can be good

Today, I'm sad...I haven't done enough, or been enough, or reached out enough to make a difference...I've been trapped by my own fear, hiding my abilities and withholding my power...I haven't let myself discover who I am or who you are...I've simply been enmeshed in my own struggle to survive...It happens.

I can stop, now, see the dawn, the birds in the tree outside my front window, listen to the quiet, as everything is still before the bustle of a new day...I can imagine the promise of living well...helping my friends, family and neighbors and discovering purpose in that service...And then, I want to cry...because its been too hard and I've failed to live up to that promise and I am not good enough...I vacillate between wallowing and just being...What's the point...why bother...who cares...then I answer, "I care".

It is enough. If I care, I can make a difference and I can continue to strive...I am enough even in my inadequacy...I am enough...We all struggle, sometimes without even knowing it. We get caught up in the emergencies of the day and fail to appreciate what is really important to us...what really makes us happy...when we contribute, we sing...when we serve we soar...when we give of ourselves to others we find meaning...Yes, it's fun to indulge ...and please don't hold back...but it can't hold a candle to helping a friend or person in need...we serve when we don't know who we are...then we serve knowing it is who we are...today, I will find a hundred small favors to do...from saying hello, to picking up something dropped and I will strive to remember that these things are enough and that I am enough, and that surrender is the path to enlightenment and service is the path to my soul...until next time...love the ones you're with, until then I remain...Respectfully yours, Larry








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Do Overs, Letting go of Regrets

Sometimes, as we move along in life, it feels like we have missed an opportunity, or failed to take advantage, or held ourselves back in some important way...we have regret...or at least a little unsettling feeling that something past has left us sad. If we make a mistake, or do an injustice, or fail someone important to us...(after getting past all our denials of it's not my fault)...we may feel bad or regret our actions or inaction's. Regret is painful and often people deny having it...but denying it isn't the same as being free of it.

Sometimes, we just need a do over...make it right...take the leap...say what we couldn't, or take back what we should...Hold your hand up if you'd like a do over...Yeah, mine was up too.

Do overs would be grand, but...Yeah...do overs don't exist...or do they? When you're ready to let go of the past and get on with the NOW do overs might well be in order. One way you can release from a loss, or bad behavior is by embracing it and acknowledging its impact on you and everyone affected..."what we resist, persists...what we fully experience disappears"...If you are still bothered by a past event, see if it's true that you haven't allowed yourself to fully experience it...trust me, you haven't...let yourself embrace the full experience, past your reactions (they hate me, I'll never win, I'll never get another chance, I'm worthless, etc.) and pain, and include how it passes into "what comes next"(I'm still here and life is moving on.)...often what comes next is a do over...I'm sorry (fill in the blank____) could we have a do over"..."I really would love to hear about your day..." "Oh, my mistake cost you your arm...I wish there could be a do over, but I can't take it back...I'm sorry is only the beginning of my support for you, I will do whatever it takes to make amends?" Then, live into your commitment. (Not self flagellation,or whipping boy...but real accountability.)

When we complete an experience see the possibilities and take action we leave regret in the dust. When and if you can't do that in your life...take a moment, find an objective coach and let them help you release from the fear or pain stored from past incompletions. Regret is hoping and wishing, Do overs are for those of us ready to get on with our lives and committed to making our world and this world a better place for everyone...until next time...love the ones your with...I remain, Respectfully Yours, Larry





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Life goes on, and on, and on...don't stop believin'

Lots of things wrong today...war, poverty, financial meltdown, corrupt politicians, more corrupt corporate dealings, bailouts...on and on and on...It's true, it's what's so and it's also "so what"!  Yeah, things are wrong, people get hurt, unfairness abounds, kids fail to find their potential, adults lose a grip on their dreams...on and on and on....

It is what's so; but it's not the only what's so...right in the middle of one of the worst periods of U. S. politics a young man stands up and speaks of hope...and we believe...no amount of fraud and sophistry can quell the human spirit; and no amount of disillusionment can keep us from believin'....

We are optimistic.  Oh, sure, we can be pessimistic about just about anything, but under it all we are resilient...you are resilient...you may be faced with things going wrong in your life and it may seem hopeless, and you may feel hopeless, or frustrated, or sad, or lonely, or depressed.  You're not alone and it's not forever, until and unless you quit believin...

If it gets to the point where you can't believe anymore, find someone who does and will work with you as your life coach...and lean on them until you can find your way back...you will...I promise you...you will....

If you know you have tried and tried and tried and your problems persist, or you realize you are trapped in a no win situation...stop, breathe, and get coached...you are triggered, you are coping and you are failing to thrive...You deserve to thrive and you can and will if you only allow yourself to believe....

Believe in yourself and believe there is a coach out there waiting to help, and able to help you find your path back to the light...Life goes on and you deserve to know of happiness, productivity, to be cherished and loved...believe and act...reach out and allow yourself to experience and release from the fear and pain clogging up any aspect of your life...remember, love the ones you're with...until next time, I remain, Respectfully Yours, larry




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Where have all the Flowers Gone?

Are you struggling, or perhaps 'trying' to be happy?  There are many of us who struggle with issues that range from unhappiness about our personal image (weight, looks, etc.) to struggles with success, money, relationships, self esteem, emotional stability, or lack of purpose.  Do you believe you are destined to struggle...or stand to the side while others seem to blossom. Ever ask yourself "why am I here?"

Maybe it's just a fluke of nature...a blip in the cosmos...perhaps living means nothing and our lives are pointless...complete and utter randomness...pointless in every way...what could be better than that?

There is no doubt that meaning starts and ends with you...without life, without YOU, nothing matters...You make life worth living and YOU bring meaning to all of the random actions of the universe...it has always been so.

Without our human consciousness of good, better, best, we would be no more than random events, but we are not. We are individual gifts, with the potential to love, inspire, support and admire...when we lose our way we forget who we really are and we struggle.

Life and self consciousness allow for meaning, purpose, goodness and evil...it is not 'out there' but within us...we have the power to be good and to bring good to every interaction and our forgetting that can bring pain and evil.  When we are hurt, and helpless, or struggling to 'get', when we stuff our vulnerability, fear and pain, steeling ourselves against the bears in our lives, we can become part of the processes that send our society into chaos...when we stop and surrender to our pain and fear we can release from our dramas and misdeeds and become a powerful force for good in our world....

Are you struggling?  Then stop, surrender, breathe, believe in yourself and in the inate goodness of our collective universe...if that is hard for you, find someone who will help you and guide you to discover your own inner harmony...if you want to know what faith is...take a leap of faith, no matter the current circumstances, that you are good and worthy and a gift, that all is unfolding as it should...and then have faith in the truth that you are loved unconditionally and that you have the power to love unconditionally, that in time it will make a difference and bring that faith to each of your interactions until it becomes true in your life...

You are the light, you are the joy, you are the meaning and purpose and gift that each of us cherish...if this is less than absolutely true for you, then your task is clear...FIND IT...until next time, I remain, respectfully yours, Larry




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Greed, a love story

I went to see "Capitalism: A Love Story" and was confronted with how little it had to do with capitalism and how much it told the story of greed. Perhaps, the message is that capitalism shall inevitably lead to greed and while I doubt that, I don't wish to debate it. What I am quite sure about is that greed and self absorption have played an increasingly destructive role in the corporate community and in our own lives...either as the victim of it or the sirens song of striving to get ours....

The helplessness many of us feel at the hands of the corporate giants is palatable today. The rationalizations used by industry to cut portions, raise prices, lower quality, cut corners and lay waste to their employees, hurt each and every one of us. We live in our society and are affected by the levels of injustices we are confronted with; but we are even more affected by the injustices that tear at the heart of our social fiber and individual integrity. We have turned the corner away from social justice and are hurtling headlong down the path of power plays, swindled riches, and social rationalization.

"We have an obligation to our stockholders", "we deserve huge bonuses", "we're too big to fail"...etc. etc. etc... If you're caught up in this, or other rationalizations, or just the head long pursuit of social media self aggrandizement and self promotion... AND you are feeling just a little empty or lost...then maybe it's time to take stock.

We are all in this together...in what?...in living on this planet...what YOU do does make a difference...character does count...caring for your neighbor will bring great rewards...saying no to greed, saying no to your boss who wants you to mislead, stopping yourself from denying someone health care because it's too expensive for your company...lying cheating, rationalizing, losing your sense of honor and fair play are done by people caught up in the rush to short term profit, or self agrandizement; and/or caught up in thinking that their small voice has no power against the tidal wave of social injustice...they are wrong...live your life caring for others, because you will soon learn it amounts to caring for yourself...stand up against unfairness, injustice, rationalization, self absorption and greed...do it today...enlist the aid of your friends and let's put a stop to greed and begin to live with peace....

Go see Capitalism ignore the dogma, be outraged by the injustice and resolve to do better, be better and have better...until next time...love the ones you're with...Until then I remain...Yours truly and respectfully, Larry






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Allowing Love: a Journey into Joy

So, do you know how much you are loved? Does it matter...really? We too often find ourselves living day to day moment to moment frustrated by the stresses of our lives. Yes, we know people love us, and yet, we still must face the burdens of our lives...we seldom trust that that love is enough or expressed to our satisfaction.

Finances, relationships, bosses, success, smog, rudeness, kids, or whatever, fill our lives with stress, angst, worry and toil...and if it isn't any of those perhaps it is simply our distress at how we are doing....

Are you a good person, kind enough, fair enough, skilled enough, just enough...and perhaps even more importantly acknowledged enough? Where is peace, and respect and honor? Is your life filled with riches, or full of 'opportunities' to overcome...are you the author or the pen...are you the paddle or the ping pong ball...who are you as you rise up in the morning?

May I suggest that you are loved...not your behavior, not your attitudes, not even your effort...just you...the one who occupies your body, sees the world through your eyes and feels each experience so intensely. I love you...I know that I do...If I do not know you that is little consequence...you are loved, cherished, appreciated, admired, respected for the gift you are...if you doubt it go find a new born infant, take a moment to be with him or her, ask yourself if you can find love for this child...if you can't it is only because you are too afraid to look...and if you can notice it is not conditioned on anything that infant can do...your love is limitless and the love in your life is as well...if this seems untrue or unimportant it is a perfect time for you to stop.

Stop what you are doing just as soon as you can reasonably do so and breathe...take stock in yourself...allow yourself an opportunity to surrender...dedicate your life to discovering and allowing love back in your life...notice how you withhold it from others "because"...and stop that...find love within yourself, find compassion within yourself and give it to everyone you meet until you can see and experience that everyone is giving it to you.

Allow love in your life and let it replace your troubles...allow love in your life and let it replace your judgements of others...allow love in your life and let it be...let it be.

You are loved...and perhaps so am I...I love you and admire you and I am terribly afraid that that is not enough...it is the burden I carry and it is lighter today because I know that today I am filled with your love...because today I know you love me...even when you may not know that yourself...You are loved and so am I...be well, until next time...I remain...Yours Truly, Larry





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Livin' Easy, Livin' Well

How are you today? I hope you are well and that your life is full of joy and satisfaction...I hope you are traveling your chosen path with energy and enthusiasm and I hope you feel fulfilled and productive with relationships that inspire and delight you...is that too much to ask for?

For many, it may seem too much to ask for...for some life is full of drama, pain, distress, upset and dissatisfaction...if this is true for you even some of the time you may wish to look at how your survival consciousness is getting in the way. Survival consciousness is the part of our awareness that tries to solve our problems using fight or flight as its tools...this is a natural and normal part of being human, but it is also the cause of most of the relationship and life living problems people deal with on a day to day basis.

A good tool for you to use is to see what is bothering you and then ask yourself will beating it up or running away "REALLY" solve this problem...if your answer is NO, then you may want to look at whether or not you have been triggered into your fight/flight/freeze consciousness.

You can easily tell if you have, because you will notice your options are either/or and not very appealing in any case...You will be looking for agreement and allies from others and you will be acting in very familiar ways and saying very familiar things about the problem.

If that is the case then take a break...take a few deep breaths and surrender your reactive, angry, helpless, frustrated, or hopeless mind to the possibility that your problem has now become your fight/flight consciousness.

Stop what you're doing and allow for the return of your Authentic Self...Seek out someone who neither agrees or disagrees with you and let them guide you through your fear and distress until once again you can see the situation as an opportunity to express your goodwill and good intentions...be with your feelings of pain, loss, and fear and allow them to pass...Seek surrender and learn how that feels for you until you no longer need to manage and can allow life to be...grow into your potential and let the grip of fight flight subside...Be well and love the ones you're with...until next time I remain...Yours Truly, Larry






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