What are 'you' Pretending Not to Know

...or are you? well, here's the rub...if you're triggered, and believe me when I say, "If you aren't now, you soon will be"; really, it's the way of life...and then you too, will be pretending not to know. That's what we do when things don't go our way, or we feel hurt by others, or we want reality to be different than it is...When you feel misused, or victimized, or at the effect of powers beyond your control, 'you', the little 'you' of your fight/flight/freeze persona, just arbitrarily decides not to know what your role in the affair really is..."I don't know why this has to be like it is...."

"Why did you do that to me? Huh, why?" "I have no idea why I lost that contract." "I was just minding my own business, and wham..."I never knew she was so unhappy." "Why are things the way they are in my life? I don't know."...Yes, you do...and no matter the circumstances, it would be a lot better if you looked around and told the truth..."What is it that I'm pretending not to know?" Good question, and even better when you answer it....

"I'm pretending not to know that I'm not a victim; I'm pretending not to know that I'm not paying attention to the concerns of others, I'm pretending not to know that I'm closed off, or self absorbed, or self important, or playing helpless, or hiding, or just being scared out of my mind..." it could be a lot of things, but that is not nearly as important as discovering what it is for you...What are you pretending not to know...and how is that affecting the quality of your life?

What I mean by that is paying attention to the level of enthusiasm you have for facing whatever challenges are coming your way...looking for opportunities to contribute to others and make their lives just a little bit better for your being there...and being in touch with your own vulnerability and making peace with it as you travel down your path...If you wake up each day with a smile on your face and a bounce to your step...well, maybe you are seeing the possibilities, if not...well....

You might wish to leave the little you and begin to allow the big YOU of your Authentic Being to emerge...that is the journey from; struggle to aliveness, or from complaint to caring, or from anger to compassion...trust me when I tell 'YOU', 'you' are pretending not to know each time you are frustrated, confused, and discouraged...and being reminded of that, can be a gift to allow the 'YOU' of your 'beingness' to reemerge...YOU are a gift, YOU are a force that can change the world...use it wisely, be patient and remain awake to your being....

Be well, tread the world gently, care a lot without penalty, find compassion in situations you never could before; and as always, love the ones you're with...until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry







Free Counter

...and in the end there was ONE...

Many of us, today, struggle with our spirituality...some find comfort in a specific modality, others pay a little lip service...and an increasing number see it as an outmoded, outdated notion, not worth another moment or thought....

Spirituality though, is not just a bunch of superstitions, it seems to be at the heart of human consciousness...we have spiritual needs...not necessarily church, mosque, or synagogue, and not a belief in some human morphed, super Deity...if those ways flick your bic, more power to you...but for the rest of us, who have tuned out and downgraded the need...we missed the point...spirituality, is as important as food, water, productive work, or the air you breathe....

You may not find your spirituality in organized religion, or mythical stories, but when you are stressed and feeling at loose ends, feeling like nothing matters, or feeling strangled by the superficial struggle to survive...you are at your own spiritual crossroads...you need more than a vacation...you need an infusion of spirit...that inestimable quality of personal worth, of cherished purpose, of passion that you matter, because...YOU DO...YOU are and have always been, a child of this universe....

Spirituality has become a dirty word for many of us because of the crimes done in the name of one religion or another...but that is throwing the baby out with the bathwater...if you have a spiritual practise, no matter what it is, focus on the universal nature of it, and dismiss the 'us or them' aspects...if you have no spiritual practice...reassess...because in truth you do...each day you wake and you strive--you express hope and promise; each day you dress, or make a meal, or appreciate a moment--the possibility of spiritual renewal is living within you...In all of life, your place is first and foremost, a witness to living, the incredible experience of acknowledging being and being witness to each other can be a spiritual awakening...it is the antidote to boredom, to stress, to anxiety and depression...it dispels ennui and doubt...discovering the power of your consciousness, the uniqueness of your being and your rightful place in the cosmos, is invigorating...and is no less important than breathing....

You are a gift, you are cherished, you are the perfect vessel to view the universe...with out you the universe would be without meaning and purpose...it does not matter that there are others, it only, and ultimately matters, that YOU do...You bring love where none existed, you bring possibilities where nothing lived, you bring tears, and joy and endless magic to a world that had none of this before you....

How do I know this? That is simple, on two occasions I was in a room with my wife and YOU emerged...Ashley first, then Devin, and everything I just shared with you here, flooded every fibre of my being...no matter the circumstance this is true of you and me, as well...the earth welcomes each newcomer with this profound reverence...Your arrival on this planet is a gift and you are the gift...fulfill that with each breath, renew that with each moment and trust that with each day that passes...You are a gift, you belong here, love a lot, laugh whenever possible, celebrate the joy and the sadness, be brave even when you can not, believe in more than drudgery and boredom, be inspired and inspiring...love the ones you're with, until next time, I remain, Respectfully Yours, Larry








Free Counter

What are You Putting Up With Today?

We all do you know...we put up with things, thinking that that is what we have to do...or it's the best there is...it isn't, we don't...'have to' that is...we have many layers of vulnerability yet to tap....

Vulnerability??? Yeah, that really scary place where we are intensely visible, acutely aware and open to being...what???...Slaughtered??? Yes and no; we were as children...WE WERE... slaughtered that is... We were taken unawares and we learned...never, never, never to be that "off guard" again...see that? off our 'guarded', controlled, safe, protected, selective self...our auto/protector is 'ON'...we manage, make do, put up with and cope...we do....

...and it is slowly killing us... if not in body, in spirit....

Yes, I know, life is good, things are grand and I am enormously pleased that that is so...and...unequivocably, we put up with things we don't need to put up with and which block us from experiencing even greater rewards of closeness and intimacy in our lives....

It happened again, to me...I have a grand life and a marvelous relationship with my wife...and tonight we found even more opportunities to break through barriers that we didn't even allow ourselves to know were there...we were putting up with way too much and after the fact it was clear how dreadful that was...we deserved more and...SO DO YOU!!

Discover the ways you put up with things...in life, in relationships, at work, with the kids...and come clean...break the habits of a life time...discover vitality, learn and experience the rich fabric which is your life...be gentle with yourself, cherish the possibilities, in moments where boredom or routine has stolen your vulnerability...notice the little voice which, while reading this, says to you, "Oh, don't be absurd things are fine, life is full of ups and downs and we're fine...who made him judge anyway"....

Not judge, seer...as in the little boy who went to see the Emperor and proclaimed, "...but daddy the emperor has no clothes." You are no different...if you look at others, you will see too...they are holding back, playing just a little bit smaller than is needed...it's not wrong, just a little sad...as best you can and in your own time...come out and play...just a little more intensely, a little more vividly...a little more alive...authentically...and if you need a boost, find a life coach, or someone to point you in the direction you have always wanted to go...living fully in your life....

You are not wrong, this is not a notice of admonishment...it is a call to you and those you love; to risk a little more, and trust a little more, and be willing to experience just a little more self possession to be YOU, the big unfettered YOU...unhindered by fear....

To the 'real' adult in you, 'hurt' is exquisite and not to be missed, we embrace the possibility of it, because we know the rewards and the loss if we don't...risk, trust, be exquisitely vulnerable...You'll find a way, I know you will, you are incredibly strong...stronger than you imagine; loving, compassionate, intuitive and creative...you'll find a way...just when you think that's all there is, you'll find a little more and know that it was all very worth it and you are worth it...Love yourself and the ones you're with, pass this on to your network of friends and contacts...until next time...I remain, Respectfully Yours, Larry








Free Counter

Wait, not now, Oh no...

I definitely don't have time to be doing this now...taxes are due, bills to pay, Mom needs help, Doctors' appointments waiting, MRI's, Radiation, Refi's, clean-ups, visits, follow ups, oh,my, who says stress isn't out there...Oh, yeah, that would be me....

Sorry, you're probably stressed out just reading this, but stress isn't in how busy we are or how much is on our plate...it isn't how dreadful the circumstances, or dire the situation...stress is our own, made up reaction to life...I'm stressed, yes, I am...I have too much to do and not enough time to do it...the things left undone are critical and crucial; and my performance is woefully lacking...I am stressed, Yes, I am....

Or not.....................I was stressed, all the classic signs, forgetful, spilling things, not being present to whatever I was doing...Yes, I was stressed...I needed to be...It was what life demanded of me...and I was goin' down fighting...but goin' down none the less....

Stress is like that, you fight the good fight, but the stress only detracts from your effectiveness, you might as well take a break because continuing will only produce more of the same...stress is a personal reaction to life circumstances and you can (and might I be so bold as to say...MUST) take a step back...I know...you can't...but do it anyway....

Whatever your life needs, and whatever you need to get done...what you, and life needs first and foremost is YOU...not the little 'you' but the big, unstressed, 'YOU'...I do speak from experience here...you take care of yourself first; as they say on the airplane, "put your mask on first, then help the children you like next"...oops too bad about little jonny...If you are going to be effective with anything in your life you first must be effective with you and your stress...get unstressed...find a quiet place and breathe, or take a yoga class, or talk to a friend that will quietly listen...seek a life coach, or take a long luxurious bath...then calm and quiet your mind by remembering that this too shall pass, you are a child of the universe, you were meant to be here, you are not alone, it doesn't really all depend on you, and you are entitled to breathe deeply, sleep soundly, and enjoy fully each moment of your life...love the ones you're with and until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry





Free Counter

R U OK?

Really...R U? Do you sleep well, wake up without an alarm lookin' forward to the new day's possibilities...R U heading down a path of your choosing, livin' the life you'd be proud to have your child live? R U confident, happy, full of compassion for others in your community...do you party enough without getting wasted and doin' stupid things...and on the other hand, do you do just enough stupid, silly things to keep the fun in your life? Are there important things for you to do and are you proud of yourself...do you know that you make a difference and your efforts are deeply appreciated?...alright then, I guess you really are okay....

...And if you're not okay, upon occasion, you can take a moment and realize it's probably because you've forgotten who you really are...another way of sayin' that is, 'you've been triggered'...You've slipped into the world of survival and instead of the world bein' your oyster, you're the one bein' eaten...life's like that some time's and when it is we all usually make the same mistake...we try to fix things...that's called coping...

Now, coping doesn't sound so bad;
"How ya doin'?"
"Oh, I'm copin'."
...except copin' ain't really so fun, it's just 'gettin' by, doin' the best you can...and makin' do...actually it's on the road to despair...when we get triggered, we lose the freshness, fun, and joy that life has to offer and things begin to take on deep and ominous meanings...It's hard, and life gets a little harder, until either, we stop coping, or we settle into the drudgery we call life....

Life should never be drudgery, or obligation, or responsibilities...life is a gift...yes, you have responsibilities and you take on obligations, but they are only worth anything when you embrace them with enthusiasm...if your obligations and responsibilities are getting you down...you are triggered and you are coping and you are one step closer to misery...if this is happening to you...stop, breathe, throw them all off, long enough for you to really breathe and refresh and then take them back one at a time and only if you really, in your heart, want to...otherwise tell the truth..."these are not for me...I need help"...living in fear and pain is not the answer for anyone and when your responsibilities, obligations or living day to day is killing you... it's time to ask for "HELP!" Then get the help you need, so that you can once again be part of the solution instead of bein' part of the problem.....

Life is meant to be lived, not survived...none of us will survive...all of us can live...be joyful, be full of compassion, seek life coaches when you are not, learn to wake with enthusiasm and a sense of how precious you are and how valuable you are and how cherished you are ...then go forth in your world, loving those around you, be well, be happy, love yourself, and remember...you are the light...until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry








Free Counter

Who let the rain in...?

Who indeed...let me know if I have this right...you don't support our troupes if you want them to come home out of harms way...you're unamerican if you don't support the war which was started to eliminate WMD's that didn't exist; and everyone with a shred of intelligence knew, didn't exist...You are a socialist, commie if you want your society to provide health care to it's citizens...Oh, yeah, that one's really true...heath care is not a right of the citizens of a society...when one of the members is sick...who cares??? If they want care let them pay their own way and if they can't??? Well, tough tamana...health care is a business...people have a right to get rich doing health care and insuring health care and anyone who thinks otherwise is just...well...wrong!!!

Anyone here ready to rethink these notions...when humans began their existence on this earth, they knew certain things, one of these things is that their group needed someone to treat, the sick and infirm...the medicine men and women were always and forever commissioned by the society...illness and disease is a community problem and the medicine person always and forever worked for the community...these dedicated doctors were called to work for the community...not once were they shouted down for being socialists...they knew that their position was one of the most revered in the society; and they knew that their calling was one they never could put down no matter what...they were "paid" as best as the society could afford and this continued well into the 19th century, as the frontier doctors would answer the call of the community and work for dinner, or vegetables, or whatever...they knew that each community needed a doctor and they filled that need...in return the community provided shelter, food, and whatever funds they could gather and everyone thought the doctor should get more for the love the community had for them...What happened???

Do you really believe that anyone in your society should be turned away from care if they show up with a broken leg, an infectious disease, a difficult pregnancy??? Should the size of your pocketbook determine the quality of your care? In all of history it never did...why now??? Health care has always been a function of the needs of the society...the health care professionals have always been employed by the society...just like the firemen, the police, and the chiefs...should the firemen check your ability to pay before responding to your fire? Should the police check your credit report before deciding who they will arrest? Should a Doctor review the contents of your wallet before viewing the contents of your burst appendix???

This is decidedly not socialism...it is humanism, or just plain common sense...the society has need of doctors and health care...each and every individual within that society needs to know that when their turn comes they will be treated with the same care and respect that they gave when they were healthy and did everything they could do to make sure their neighbors were cared for when they needed it. Health care, fire protection, police protection are all social responsibilities...and the individuals that fill these posts do so just as much for you and me as they do for the pay check...do you really want to be treated by a doctor that will quit and go into engineering if (s)he isn't paid enough? If the calling is not there to be a doctor, all the money in the world will not make them a good doctor, and if the calling is there, no amount of difficulty will stop them from ministering to the sick....

It is obscene to allow insurance companies to make a dime on health care...it is farcical to expect only the well healed to have effective medical care...it is criminal to deny care to someone on their ability to pay...I know, let 'em eat cake....

We are a tribe, albeit, a big one, and we need each other...some things just should never be privatized, roads, water, air, and health care...be kind to yourself, love yourself, discover how important it is to be generous to your neighbor, love the one's you're with and in the fullness of time be glad you live in a society that knows, in time, you too will need their care and they will be there to provide it...until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry




Free Counter

Follow the Money

Yes, capitalism is our way and socialism is really, really, bad...maybe firemen should get an "ability to pay" before coming to your house, and cops arrest the one with the least money (oops, maybe that is happening)...No, No, No you say government should do some things...just not health care....


Oh really...so let me get this straight...triage should be done with your wallet first...if there are five people in medical need (you being one of them) and these needs are of various medical urgency's we should address the needs of the rich first...so a senator's hangnail comes before your burst appendix...profit first....


You know for the first fifty thousand years or so medical treatment was done by the government...that government included the witch doctor...or herbalist and the community was served by them equally...when a community needs health care it is the community that licenses and authorizes the gifted practitioners...has always been that way...trying to make a profit out of the communities need for health care is like trying to privatize the army (oops, already doing that) making war profitable is a good thing... (isn't it?)...making the hospitals motivated to get rid of patients is a wonderful and effective way to do health care...surely you see that...paying insurance companies to find ways to deny coverage for the sake of their investors...just makes sense...denying coverage to my mother so that all involved make a few extra bucks is just the 'american' way...personally, I love it...what the hell...the old bag is 86 and dying anyway...giving her a few extra days or years of a quality life just doesn't make sense ECONOMICALLY...Yep I get it...You're next you know; and I know you can see...really no matter how much money you have, that actually giving you what you are paying for just doesn't make sense to the good investors and the well being of doctors who simply need even more that the millions they often get...pay the provider one fee, then tell them that's all you get whether you keep them one day or the 100 that we promised them...yeah, those places sure have your best interests at heart...count on it...mom did....


Well, remember, having health care which works for everyone, works for no one...so let's keep the profit in non profit and get those pikers who just want to be taken care of when they're ill off the dole and out of the way...health care for the deserving rich is my motto...if you can't afford it who cares anyway...guess who's havin' a bad day....remember love the ones you're with even if they can't afford it and be kind to yourself...until next time, I remain...Respectfully Yours, Larry





Free Counter